Bach Flower Advice

What to do when feeling lost in life?

Qué hacer cuando uno se siente perdido en la vida

The sense of feeling lost in your life can be a very painful experience. Regardless of whether you feel lost in a relationship, at work, or elsewhere, you can rest assured that you’re not the first person to feel this way.

Ultimately, it is possible to take something positive from what you are feeling and move forward. Use this time as a springboard for change in your life. This is a period of transformation, so use it to your advantage.


Things to bear in mind when you’re feeling lost in life

Hooray! You’re normal!

At some stage all of us will be feeling the way that you do now. Some of us will have the feeling we are ‘lost’ at key moments throughout our life. We look around at everyone else and think they have it so much better and assume everyone else knows what they are doing and where they are going. This is not the case.  We can never know what another person is going through or has gone through. Why not share your feelings with a few friends and see what sort of experiences they have had?

You are in control

It often happens that we don’t feel like we’re in control of our life. This can happen for a variety of reasons. The thing to remember however is that you are not a victim. You can choose your attitude and your reactions. How you feel is up to you. Do not be a passive bystander in your life. Make changes. Ultimately you decide on the direction you need to go in next.

Embrace the freedom that being lost offers you

If you suddenly find yourself wallowing in a miasma of despair, and you’re uncertain of what your life is about, take heart! Here’s the best chance you’ll ever be offered to create new meaning in your life and take a new direction.

Listen to your heart

Sometimes you need to take a time out of your life and discover what it is that your mind is trying to tell you. Spending time alone, perhaps on a long walk, or a journey, can really help you pin down what’s going on. You can only read the signs of your own heart’s desire if you stop to read them. If you can slow your life down enough you will hear the messages that apply to you, and you can take action on where to go from here, or not, it’s up to you.

You don’t need approval from others

Feeling lost can stem from the fact that other people don’t seem to approve of you, what you do or what you say. Forget them. You shouldn’t need the approval of others to validate yourself. The way others judge us, says more about them than it does about us. If you have lived your life based on what other people believe is right, then of course you will have lost the very essence of who you are. You cannot craft your life based on the belief and value systems that others hold, or try to foist on you.

Acknowledge who you are

You may have started out trying to be one thing, but ended up as something else. Perhaps you still hanker after a dream or an ambition from when you were younger. Don’t be down about it, it’s fabulous actually. There’s no time like the present to consider who you are and acknowledge the experiences and skills you have. Once that’s done, you can look at where to go next, and maybe you still have time to write your novel, set up a bakery or climb Everest! Life is all about change, and if you’ve come to a crossroads, you can make that change right now.

Who you are now is not who you were

We all make mistakes and we learn from them and move on. Mistakes help us to grow as human beings. Don’t label yourself - acknowledge that who you will be tomorrow can be very different from who you are today or who you were yesterday.

Get in touch with your passions

Can you remember what it is that makes your eyes light up and your heart burst with happiness? It may be a long time since you were in touch with your passions, but perhaps it’s time you did. Stop making excuses about the time not being right because the time will never be right unless you make it so. The time is now, so get on with it!

Do something that makes you feel challenged

If life has become stuck in a rut, there is no time like the present to do something completely new. Think up some new ambitions and go for it. You may be 50 years’ old and in a secure job, but if you’ve always wanted to backpack around Asia, what’s to stop you doing that? OK, perhaps an extended trip is out of the question, but you could still have a weekend away somewhere you’ve never been before and explore a new town. In order to create new meaning and direction in life, it is sometimes necessary to take risks.

Ask for help if you need it

Sometimes this feeling is too big for one person. If you would benefit from talking to someone else about how lost you feel, do reach out for help. You could speak to your doctor, a life coach, a counsellor or a friend. Be open to suggestions and guidance and take your time to find what is right for you. It will be worth the effort!

Created by Tom Vermeersch

Tom Vermeersch

Tom Vermeersch is a certified Psychologist and Bach flower expert with more than 30 years of experience.

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What to do when feeling lost in life?

What to do when feeling lost in life?
Qué hacer cuando uno se siente perdido en la vida

The sense of feeling lost in your life can be a very painful experience. Regardless of whether you feel lost in a relationship, at work, or elsewhere, you can rest assured that you’re not the first person to feel this way.

Ultimately, it is possible to take something positive from what you are feeling and move forward. Use this time as a springboard for change in your life. This is a period of transformation, so use it to your advantage.


Things to bear in mind when you’re feeling lost in life

Hooray! You’re normal!

At some stage all of us will be feeling the way that you do now. Some of us will have the feeling we are ‘lost’ at key moments throughout our life. We look around at everyone else and think they have it so much better and assume everyone else knows what they are doing and where they are going. This is not the case.  We can never know what another person is going through or has gone through. Why not share your feelings with a few friends and see what sort of experiences they have had?

You are in control

It often happens that we don’t feel like we’re in control of our life. This can happen for a variety of reasons. The thing to remember however is that you are not a victim. You can choose your attitude and your reactions. How you feel is up to you. Do not be a passive bystander in your life. Make changes. Ultimately you decide on the direction you need to go in next.

Embrace the freedom that being lost offers you

If you suddenly find yourself wallowing in a miasma of despair, and you’re uncertain of what your life is about, take heart! Here’s the best chance you’ll ever be offered to create new meaning in your life and take a new direction.

Listen to your heart

Sometimes you need to take a time out of your life and discover what it is that your mind is trying to tell you. Spending time alone, perhaps on a long walk, or a journey, can really help you pin down what’s going on. You can only read the signs of your own heart’s desire if you stop to read them. If you can slow your life down enough you will hear the messages that apply to you, and you can take action on where to go from here, or not, it’s up to you.

You don’t need approval from others

Feeling lost can stem from the fact that other people don’t seem to approve of you, what you do or what you say. Forget them. You shouldn’t need the approval of others to validate yourself. The way others judge us, says more about them than it does about us. If you have lived your life based on what other people believe is right, then of course you will have lost the very essence of who you are. You cannot craft your life based on the belief and value systems that others hold, or try to foist on you.

Acknowledge who you are

You may have started out trying to be one thing, but ended up as something else. Perhaps you still hanker after a dream or an ambition from when you were younger. Don’t be down about it, it’s fabulous actually. There’s no time like the present to consider who you are and acknowledge the experiences and skills you have. Once that’s done, you can look at where to go next, and maybe you still have time to write your novel, set up a bakery or climb Everest! Life is all about change, and if you’ve come to a crossroads, you can make that change right now.

Who you are now is not who you were

We all make mistakes and we learn from them and move on. Mistakes help us to grow as human beings. Don’t label yourself - acknowledge that who you will be tomorrow can be very different from who you are today or who you were yesterday.

Get in touch with your passions

Can you remember what it is that makes your eyes light up and your heart burst with happiness? It may be a long time since you were in touch with your passions, but perhaps it’s time you did. Stop making excuses about the time not being right because the time will never be right unless you make it so. The time is now, so get on with it!

Do something that makes you feel challenged

If life has become stuck in a rut, there is no time like the present to do something completely new. Think up some new ambitions and go for it. You may be 50 years’ old and in a secure job, but if you’ve always wanted to backpack around Asia, what’s to stop you doing that? OK, perhaps an extended trip is out of the question, but you could still have a weekend away somewhere you’ve never been before and explore a new town. In order to create new meaning and direction in life, it is sometimes necessary to take risks.

Ask for help if you need it

Sometimes this feeling is too big for one person. If you would benefit from talking to someone else about how lost you feel, do reach out for help. You could speak to your doctor, a life coach, a counsellor or a friend. Be open to suggestions and guidance and take your time to find what is right for you. It will be worth the effort!


Marie Pure

Other articles


Feeling blue

Feeling blue?

Feeling blue? You're not alone! We all feel sad at times; it's a normal human emotion. Sometimes, it's clear to see what has triggered our depression. Common reasons for feeling sad include bereavement, the end of a relationship, losing your job or money problems. But it's not always so clearcut.

Read the complete article

Is your sex life putting your relationship at risk

Is your sex life putting your relationship at risk?

Sexual desire is a complex interaction of hormones, emotions and well-being. When your partner is not as interested in sex as you are, it’s rarely a rejection of you as a person. So it’s essential to be as empathetic as you can regarding your differing libidos.

Read the complete article

Dealing with British Summer Time

Dealing with British Summer Time

Some people are overly sensitive to the time change and it can take days, if not weeks, for them to feel right again, while others barely even notice. 

Read the complete article

Why not me

Why not me?

It's natural to compare our own lives with those of others - weighing up the pros and cons of situations helps us make decisions. But there can be a downside when you find you're constantly comparing yourself with others, envying their seemingly perfect lives and wondering why they are luckier, more prosperous, and better looking than you.

Read the complete article

Standing Up To A Narcissistic Pervert

Standing Up To A Narcissistic Pervert

Whether it's with a romantic partner or a housemate, there's no doubt that a relationship with a narcissist can be very challenging. But are there ways to cope better? Or is it better to leave the relationship? 

Read the complete article

Why you're not the best

Why you're not the best

What are your aims in life? Do you plan to be rich, to be a top footballer, to be a good parent, or to become Prime Minister? However efficiently you plan your life, sooner or later you are going to come up against obstacles to achieving your goals.

Read the complete article

Are most people good or bad

Are most people good or bad?

Do you sometimes despair about humanity because it seems there are far more bad people than good? Are we primarily selfish individuals, thinking only about our own needs? Or is this cynical belief just because we spend so much time online? The truth is more complicated!

Read the complete article

Simple tips to not be afraid of the future

Simple tips to not be afraid of the future

No one knows what the future holds, so don't waste time and energy worrying about it. Read our tips and find out how to stop being afraid of what might never happen.

Read the complete article

Are things moving too fast for you

Are things moving too fast for you?

If you're worried that the world is changing too fast, you're not alone: technology is constantly developing, and it can be challenging to keep up with all the changes. As a result, many people - not just the older generations - feel anxious that they might get left behind.

Read the complete article

12 easy ways to get people to like you

12 easy ways to get people to like you

Have you ever noticed that some people are instantly likeable? Many people believe that people will only like you because of natural traits you're born with: good looks, talent and sociability. But this is a misconception. Getting people to like you is within your control, and it's all to do with self-belief, knowing yourself and being emotionally intelligent. Here's what to do to be more likeable.

Read the complete article

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