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Many people enjoy a drink, and most of us choose just to enjoy a social drink now and again. Perhaps we’ll share a bottle of wine with a friend one evening a week, or have a glass after dinner. On special occasions we go out and enjoy a little more. This is all harmless. But what happens when the occasional glass of wine, or pint after work, becomes a regular occurrence? When do you know that your drinking has crossed the line from something moderate you do socially, to something that is more of a problem?
The thing is, the effect of the amount we drink will vary according to the individual. Some of us can drink more than others and it causes no real harm in the short term, so it’s difficult to figure out where to draw your own line is between social drinking and problem drinking. You have to consider whether the amount YOU drink causes problems for you or not.
Alcoholism, and alcohol abuse, can sometimes sneak up on you while your attention is elsewhere. You need to take note of the warning signs. Sometimes these can be quite subtle and you might not notice you have a drinking problem Here are some signs and symptoms to look out for.
Do you feel guilty or ashamed about your drinking?
Are you hiding how much you drink – perhaps getting rid of the bottles or cans before anyone else notices?
Has anyone expressed concern to you about how much you drink?
When you want to relax, do you automatically reach for a drink of something? Is having a drink the only way you can relax?
Are you unhappy if you go somewhere and there is no alcohol available?
When you're sober, do you regret some of the things you did or said while drinking?
Have you ever drunk so much that you have forgotten what you did or said while you were drinking.
Do you start off with the best of intentions, aiming to have just a glass or so, and then drink far more than you intended.
Do you drink heavily when you feel disappointed, or you’re stressed, or you’re unhappy with someone?
Do you drink and drive? Do you drink and operate machinery? Do you drink even though you shouldn’t because you are taking prescribed medication?
Is your drinking affecting your interaction with others? Do you get into fights? Do you fall out with friends? Does your partner get upset? Do your children avoid you?
Are you having to increase the amount you drink, just so you can get a buzz? Can you drink much more than other people?
Do you usually want to continue drinking even after your friends say they've had enough?
Do you sometimes binge drink for days at a time?
Do you have any physical symptoms of withdrawal? For example, when you are sober do you have any of the following:
Do you want to give up drinking, and have tried, but the lure is too strong?
Are you neglecting your responsibilities, whether these are at work, home or socially? This may be because you are drinking, or because you are recovering from a drinking bout.
Do you blame others? A partner who doesn’t understand you, your boss, your parents?
You may be abusing alcohol – by having too much too regularly for example, but you don’t consider yourself an alcoholic. The problem is that the step between the two is quite small. It may take one change in your life and you’ll head into a downward spiral. You might have a bereavement, a relationship break-up, a job loss or some other trauma. Will you be able to reign in your excesses? You are at serious risk.
If you rationalize your drinking habits, lie about them, or refuse point blank to discuss the subject, then seriously consider what is going on. Admitting you have a problem is the very first step – you’ll need courage and strength to face this head on, but support is out there – grab it with both hands.
Created by Tom Vermeersch
Tom Vermeersch is a certified Psychologist and Bach flower expert with more than 30 years of experience.
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Many people enjoy a drink, and most of us choose just to enjoy a social drink now and again. Perhaps we’ll share a bottle of wine with a friend one evening a week, or have a glass after dinner. On special occasions we go out and enjoy a little more. This is all harmless. But what happens when the occasional glass of wine, or pint after work, becomes a regular occurrence? When do you know that your drinking has crossed the line from something moderate you do socially, to something that is more of a problem?
The thing is, the effect of the amount we drink will vary according to the individual. Some of us can drink more than others and it causes no real harm in the short term, so it’s difficult to figure out where to draw your own line is between social drinking and problem drinking. You have to consider whether the amount YOU drink causes problems for you or not.
Alcoholism, and alcohol abuse, can sometimes sneak up on you while your attention is elsewhere. You need to take note of the warning signs. Sometimes these can be quite subtle and you might not notice you have a drinking problem Here are some signs and symptoms to look out for.
Do you feel guilty or ashamed about your drinking?
Are you hiding how much you drink – perhaps getting rid of the bottles or cans before anyone else notices?
Has anyone expressed concern to you about how much you drink?
When you want to relax, do you automatically reach for a drink of something? Is having a drink the only way you can relax?
Are you unhappy if you go somewhere and there is no alcohol available?
When you're sober, do you regret some of the things you did or said while drinking?
Have you ever drunk so much that you have forgotten what you did or said while you were drinking.
Do you start off with the best of intentions, aiming to have just a glass or so, and then drink far more than you intended.
Do you drink heavily when you feel disappointed, or you’re stressed, or you’re unhappy with someone?
Do you drink and drive? Do you drink and operate machinery? Do you drink even though you shouldn’t because you are taking prescribed medication?
Is your drinking affecting your interaction with others? Do you get into fights? Do you fall out with friends? Does your partner get upset? Do your children avoid you?
Are you having to increase the amount you drink, just so you can get a buzz? Can you drink much more than other people?
Do you usually want to continue drinking even after your friends say they've had enough?
Do you sometimes binge drink for days at a time?
Do you have any physical symptoms of withdrawal? For example, when you are sober do you have any of the following:
Do you want to give up drinking, and have tried, but the lure is too strong?
Are you neglecting your responsibilities, whether these are at work, home or socially? This may be because you are drinking, or because you are recovering from a drinking bout.
Do you blame others? A partner who doesn’t understand you, your boss, your parents?
You may be abusing alcohol – by having too much too regularly for example, but you don’t consider yourself an alcoholic. The problem is that the step between the two is quite small. It may take one change in your life and you’ll head into a downward spiral. You might have a bereavement, a relationship break-up, a job loss or some other trauma. Will you be able to reign in your excesses? You are at serious risk.
If you rationalize your drinking habits, lie about them, or refuse point blank to discuss the subject, then seriously consider what is going on. Admitting you have a problem is the very first step – you’ll need courage and strength to face this head on, but support is out there – grab it with both hands.
Sexual desire is a complex interaction of hormones, emotions and well-being. When your partner is not as interested in sex as you are, it’s rarely a rejection of you as a person. So it’s essential to be as empathetic as you can regarding your differing libidos.
For many people, 2020 has been one of the worst years they can remember. The COVID -19 pandemic and social unrest have changed our lives in ways we would not have believed possible a year ago. And when January 2021 comes around, we're still likely to be facing many challenges. Can 2021 be a better year?
Read the complete article
Do you feel you're always doing the same things and not getting anywhere? It's common to feel stuck in a rut, treading water and just going through the motions.
Motivation can be somewhat elusive - some days, you just can't seem to make yourself do the stuff you don't want to. But putting things off just leads to stress, frustration and a sense of guilt.
Do you suffer from a disorder known as "musturbation"? This term was first coined in the 1950s by psychotherapist Albert Ellis and described the way a negative inner voice rules our minds and bludgeons us with words such as "must", "should", and "ought".
Your relationship ends, or you lose your job, and you get stuck in a rut of negative thoughts and suffering. How good are you at letting go of grudges and accepting that some things are beyond your control? Take our quiz to find out!
Read the complete article
Learn how to recognise the signs of stress and avoid slipping into a burnout or a bore-out
Whether it's with a romantic partner or a housemate, there's no doubt that a relationship with a narcissist can be very challenging. But are there ways to cope better? Or is it better to leave the relationship?
Bad habits waste your energy and time. They disrupt your life, risk your health and stop you from achieving your aims. So why do we do them? And what can we do to break our bad habits?
While you often hear people joking that they have OCD because they like to keep their house clean and tidy, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder can be a distressing and debilitating mental health condition with a wide range of symptoms.
Bach Flowers are not medicinal but harmless plant extracts which are used to support health.
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